How to survive a visit to Bryce Canyon: a brief survival outline

A couple of words about your personal safety while visiting Bryce Canyon.

Since Bryce Canyon is a natural park, it’s populated not only by — often harmless — visitors, but also by bad-ass animals like bears and mountain lions. Remember: bad-ass animals have no respect for you as a human being, nor any concern about your physical and mental integrity.

How to survive a visit to Bryce Canyon: Your Safety is Your Responsibility

How to survive a visit to Bryce Canyon: Your Safety is Your Responsibility

It happens that a savage animal gets hungry. A well-nourished tourist like yourself — due to your great nutritional value — may be perceived as a legitimate culinary target, and may consequently be attacked and then devoured, often alive. So read the safety instructions first, especially if looking particularly mouthwatering (click on the photo above to enlarge).

The following short summary of the safety regulations may also prove helpful. After an analysis of the official Bryce Canyon safety poster, I compiled the essential brief protocol: be cool, throw rocks, fight, kick, scream, be aggressive. This might help you survive a predator attack, and considerably raise your esteem among your fellow visitors.

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